What is the latest The Procession to Calvary patch?

The latest The Procession to Calvary patch is "Immortal John Triptych Reveal", published April 30, 2026. Read the full notes and related updates on GamePatchNote.

How many people are playing The Procession to Calvary right now?

The Procession to Calvary currently has 3 concurrent players on Steam — a live count tracked on GamePatchNote.

When was The Procession to Calvary released?

The Procession to Calvary released on Apr 9, 2020 by Joe Richardson.

Where can I read The Procession to Calvary patch notes and news?

GamePatchNote tracks the full The Procession to Calvary update history — patch notes, hotfixes, and news in one place at https://gamepatchnote.com/games/the-procession-to-calvary.

The Procession to Calvary Patch Notes, News & Live Player Count

Signal Acquired · Wire IncomingSYS.0x4A · T-00:00:03

Steam·Indie·Battle.net·SteamSpy·Patch Wire

gpn://node-04.wire

>uplink://steam.handshakeOK

>uplink://indie.handshakeOK

>uplink://bnet.handshakeOK

>decrypt://patch.wireOK

>sync://player.censusOK

>assemble://dispatch.queueLIVE

$stream --now

StreamingTRANSFER · PACKETS 1.2K

PING12ms

NODES14/14

LAT48ms

WIREALIVE

Detailed

A time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for [just one more murder…] -Ecclesiastes 3:8 Story Huzzah! The holy war is over! Your oppressors have been vanquished, the churches of the Old God lay in ruin and thousands of innocent people have been murdered! But it's not all good news; the tyrant Heavenly Peter has escaped your clutches, and you have been tasked with the mission of finding him... Your journey will take you through a richly detailed landscape built from hundreds of different Renaissance paintings. You will steal a ship, feed a donkey, compete in a talent contest, assist an inept street magician, sing, dance, play the (magic?) flute, poke a man's face, hunt for treasure and have a chat with Our Lord God Almighty... But will you find Heavenly Peter? And if you do, how will you take your revenge!? FeaturesPointing and Clicking – A traditional point and click interface, with a 'verb coin' interaction menu and a simple inventory from which you can drag and drop your preciously hoarded items.Renaissance Artwork – Paintings by Rembrandt, Botticelli, Michelangelo and many more are brought together into one consistent world, in a way that is also as sympathetic as possible to the original works.Classical Music – a soundtrack selected to fit with the style of the artwork. Music from classical composers such as Vivaldi, Bach and George Frideric Handel will accompany you on your journey.Standalone Story – The Procession to Calvary is set in the same world as Four Last Things, but its story can be played independently.Optional Murder – You will be equipped with a sword. This will become useful in a number of different situations, but you will be strongly discouraged from using it on people. Ignoring this advice – and murdering anyone who stands in your way – will serve as a useful method of skipping any puzzles you don't like. But be warned; your actions might come back to haunt you...Nonsense – A style of humour reminiscent of the surreal, anarchic comedy of Monty Python. Lofty subject matter is treated with refreshing flippancy. Gags about butts are taken very seriously. But rest assured, while some of the jokes may be ridiculous, the puzzles make perfect sense! (or at least adhere to a consistent internal logic)Moments of Surprising Profundity – Actually, no... Don't read too much into it.Special thanks to SUPERHOT PRESENTS, whose support made this project possible.